Professor Fry, Professor Fry
by Smartguyuk1
Summary: .. He'll make you think, he'll make you cry.  "Unfortunately most of the students are very intelligent, which of course means they'll never be any good at theoretical physics."
1. The Classroom

I can't stay awake anymore. I thought teaching at Mars University would help distract me and stop my mind becoming stale. Unfortunately most of the students are very intelligent, which of course means they'll never be any good at theoretical physics.

One of my students shows great promise though. He's almost as dumb as I once was but with a great imagination. He sits next to that Christine girl so it's not too hard to figure out what he's imagining, but at least he hasn't filled his head with useless 'facts'.

I think I must be asleep now. I know because I always see her in my sleep, my long lost love. Guilt will not allow me to forget her. I can't forgive myself for her death.

"Leela, I know this is just a dream but I need to tell you that I'm sorry and that it was all my fault. It won't be long before I can put things right. I'm almost ready."

The dreams are always the same. She opens her mouth to reply but before she can say anything someone or something always...

"Professor Fry? Professor Fry? Wake up!"

"Yes damn it. Who are you, what do you want?" I snap as my eyes open and the owner of the voice slowly comes into focus.

"Sorry sir it's... it's Jonathan. You asked me to wake you if you ever fell asleep in class," he says as he nervously backs off back to his seat.

I can understand now why my nephew Hubert always fell asleep during the day. It wasn't because he was old. It was because he was up all night experimenting with this, or inventing that. Who would have thought I would take after him, although technically I suppose he took after me. He was a great man, a little senile but a great man nonetheless. Even after what happened. Oh how I miss him!

I look up at the room of young faces. They all look back expectantly. All but Jonathan who's busy pretending not to stare at Christine.

"So Jonathan, as you were so rude as to interrupt my nap. Would you care to tell the class what an L unit is, and what it's used for?"

Poor lad. I know he hasn't got a clue what the answer is. He's wasting his time here and he's too young to realise how valuable time is.

"Can anyone else tell me?"

I smile as a sea of hands are raise in front of me. They've all filled their heads with useless junk.

"That's what I thought."

As if on queue the bell rings indicating the end of the lesson.

"Ok everyone read chapters eleven and twelve and we'll discuss them on Monday. Have a nice weekend."

Three, two, one...

"Jonathan, I'd like you to stay behind for a moment please."

I wait until the last student has left and the doors close.

"Why are you here Jonathan, why are you taking my class?"

I suppress a smile whilst I watch him panic and choke on his own words.

"I err... really want to learn about the universe," he says looking down at his shoes.

An awful answer, but can see some truth in it? Possibly, but that isn't the main reason he's here.

"I am over one hundred and fifty-three years old, if you think you can fool me that easily you're dumber than I thought."

He gives me a hurtful look. One that I would have worn when I was younger, before...

"I am going to ask you one last time, and if I don't believe you I will make sure you are thrown out if this university. Now why are you in my class?"

He gives me a desperate look and then finally caves.

"I'm here because of a girl," he says avoiding my gaze.

I let my smile show which seems to ease him slightly.

"Let me guess. You would do anything for this girl but she won't give you the time of day."

He nods at me sadly. It all seems so familiar to me.

"And to make matters worse whenever you tell her the way you feel she turns you down stating intellectual incompatibility and suggests there would be workplace conflicts."

He continues to stare at the floor.

"That means she thinks you're dumb and she can't stand to be near you, but she humors you because she doesn't want to be seen as a mean person."

He looks up at me. A tear in his eye perhaps? I don't want to do this to him, but I know it's for the best. I only wish someone had done it to me all those years ago.

"Actually, I think she just feels sorry for me," he says no doubt feeling better for getting it off his chest.

"I'm sorry I've been wasting your time professor. I really do wish I was smart enough to understand your class. It all sounds so amazing."

I sigh and sit next to him.

"You don't have to be here to understand the universe Jonathan. The best way to understand it is to explore it and be a part of it."

"I wouldn't know where to start sir."

"You can start by meeting me in my lab tonight. I have an important experiment I need help with."


	2. The Lab

"He's not gonna come you know?"

"He will Bender, he'll be here soon."

"Oh yeah. How can you be so sure?"

I think about it for a moment.

"Because I would have."

"You mean before you stopped being fun?"

I sigh. I've had the same discussion with him thousands of times. It always ends with him shutting himself down.

"You know Bender, if you stopped being so stubborn I wouldn't need his help at all."

A knock on the door stops the argument before it starts.

"Yes? Come in, come in."

"Oh, hello professor. Sorry I'm a little late I was..."

"Yes, yes, yes. That's fine, that's fine." I interrupt before he can give me some ridiculous and most likely true explanation of the events that indeed caused him to be late.

I wave him towards me but he seems uncontrollably drawn towards the antique bending unit standing lifelessly in the corner of the lab.

"Wow! What's this old thing?"

He leans in closer and closer, and I wait for the inevitable...

"BOO!"

I shake my head as I watch Jonathan leap back and fall flat on his ass.

"It's alive!" he says in surprise.

"Technically I'm not alive meatbag, I have no soul."

Jonathan picks himself up.

"Oh yeah right, because you're a robot."

"No, because he sold it for a pack of smokes." I quickly say, stealing the punch line from Bender much to his annoyance.

"So..." continues Jonathan, "who or what are you?"

"My names Bender, and I'm a bender."

"Hello Bender I'm Jonathan."

"Jonathan? That's a stupid name. I'm gonna call you Chump."

"You're the chump."

"Oh yeah, bite my shiny metal ass."

"Come over here and say that."

The exchange of insults lasts a few more minutes until both Bender and Jonathan are left with nothing else to say.

Eventually the silence is broken by the two of them bursting into laughter.

"You know what Johnny Boy; you're a lot of fun. I swore I would never move again until four eyes over there got his groove back, but for you I'll make an exception. Why don't you come back later? We'll go get drunk and maybe blow something up."

Bender didn't give Jonathan a chance to answer before shutting himself down.

"What happened?"

"He turned himself off. He only turns himself on every now and then to see if I'm still alive and going to be of any amusement to him."

Jonathan looked shocked.

"What a jerk!"

"Actually he used to be my best friend. That was a long time ago and I was a different man then. In some ways I suppose you could say a better man, just not very smart."

I stop and rub my forehead trying to force back the painful memories. Perhaps now is the time to get things off my chest.

I look at the young man in front of me.

"Have a seat Jonathan. I need to tell you a story."

"When I was younger, about your age in fact, I was in love with a beautiful cyclops woman. She was amazing and she meant everything to me.

She, however, did not feel the same. She thought I was immature and I dare say she even thought I was stupid."

"You stupid? You're probably the smartest man on Mars!"

Probably!

"I wasn't always. Once upon a time I was a simple delivery boy, and even that task was too complex for me at times."

"What happened to make you change?"

"My nephew invented a machine to increase intelligence. There it is over there in fact."

He looks round, his eyes widening as he studies the machine. I don't need to ask what he's thinking.

"No," I say firmly.

He turns quickly back to me.

"But you could use that machine on me. You can make me as smart as you are."

"No," I repeat.

He looks down sadly at the floor at first but as the anger builds up in him so, evidently, does his confidence.

"Why the hell did you ask me here professor. You said you could help me."

"And I will Jonathan, but not like that."

"Why not? It was good enough for you and from the sound of it you used it for exactly the same reasons I want to."

"That confounded machine cost me the woman I loved," I scream back at him.

I take my glasses off and rub my eyes. Maybe I shouldn't have told him about the machine? No, he has a right to know everything.

"You're right Jonathan I'm a hypocrite, but please believe me when I tell you it won't make you happy."

I can see the anger in his face subside a little.

"There was a surge in the machine's shutdown sequence. Leela, the woman I lost, pulled me out and pushed me away before it exploded. I escaped with minor injuries but she caught the full force of the blast. She died in my arms then and there."

I stop a moment to swallow the lump in my thought.

"Even after all these years I still can't get over what happened. She died because of my inability to accept who I was. She paid the price for my ultimate act of stupidity. Now I have a way to repair some of the damage i've caused, but I need your help."

I let another moment pass to let our emotions settle.

"Ok professor. What can I do to help?"


	3. The Experiment

"So you just want me to sit in one side of the machine whilst you sit in the other side?"

"Exactly."

"Why?"

I was hoping he wasn't going to ask that.

"You see Jonathan, this machine no longer just augments brain functions. After years of research and even more years experimenting it can now transmit brain waves anywhere, and more importantly anywhen but only through itself."

"But you're the only person to have ever used it."

"Exactly."

I wait for the information to settle in his head.

"So... You plan on sending a thought back in time to yourself before the machine exploded. But won't that alter history and make one of those paradox thingies."

"I'm glad something I've taught you in class has stuck but you didn't pay attention during the lesson I have about multiple dimensions. What has happened will happen, there is no way of changing what has already come to pass."

"But then..."

"It's very simple Jonathan; my actions will simply create a new dimension, a new universe if you will."

"One in which you and Leela can be together."

"More importantly, a universe where I can be myself."

"I still don't understand why you need me?"

"You will act as a tether to tie me to this reality so that I am able to distinguish between the two."

"I have one more question professor. Is it safe?"

Most likely the best question I have ever been asked during my time at this university.

"Don't worry Jonathan. You will be perfectly safe. Before we start the experiment I wish to fulfill my promise to you but you must do exactly what I say. Drop out of this university and forget everything you've learnt here. In my office is a letter addressed to Cubert Farnsworth. Deliver it to him yourself on your next visit to Earth."

I activate the machine.

"Sure thing Professor, good luck." he says to me as we both sit down in the machine and the universe goes dark.

Have I fallen asleep again? I must be, I can see her in the distance.

"Leela," I scream, but my voice seems lost in the vastness in which I find myself.

I run to her getting closer and closer until I can almost touch her.

This is the point I usually wake up.

I put my hand on her shoulder. I can feel the warmth and softness of her skin. She takes hold if my hand and turns.

"Hello Fry."


	4. The Funeral

I can't believe how many people and... things are here. I don't think I've ever seen so many different aliens in one place.

I felt a little out of place at the funeral but I got the impression nearly everyone felt the same. Who would have thought one man could touch so many lives.

I still have one more thing I need to do for the professor. Luckily the wake is exactly where I need to be; Planet Express.

"Hello, you must be Jonathan."

I turn to find an almost mirror image of the professor in front of me, except this man's nose is completely different.

"My name is Cubert Farnsworth and this is my associate Dwight Conrad."

"Oh, it's a pleasure to meet you both. I'm very sorry for your loss."

"Thank you. I understand you were there when he passed?"

"Yes, it happened during an experiment."

"I see."

Why doesn't he ask for details? I would have thought he'd want to know everything that had happened.

"He asked me to give you this letter when I came to Earth."

Please read it I'm dying to know what it says.

"Interesting. It says I should employ you as a delivery boy which is good news because it just so happens that exact position has just opened up."

"Why, what happened to you last delivery boy?"

"Oh the poor son of a err, but that's not important. Your first job will be to pick up and deliver a bending unit to yourself from Mars University. Apparently the professor left it to you in his will. Here, everything you need to know is on this career chip."

"Thank you. I don't know what to say."

"Just don't be late or you'll have to answer to your captain and she has one hell of a temper on her."


End file.
